BOOKS!

BOOKS OF THE MONTH..

'EASY' by Pusilanimity Crease

It was meant to be an easy job. All gangster Derek Unpleasant had to do was drive to a small village in Scotland without being murdered immediately upon arrival but he couldn’t even fucking do that properly. Now he’s dead things that haven’t been what they seem start being uncovered in a terrifying reveal that makes everyone shit themselves. The sleepy village of Kilt, a small, lakeside hamlet in the Scottish highlands with a pub and a coffee shop is actually home to 350 criminals – all of whom have been sent to trial a groundbreaking social experiment and answer a question – if you put all the people who love crime and violence and murder in a remote place where they can’t bother anyone else, can they peacefully co-exist?

The answer, it seems is no.

Or is it?

Yes.

It's definitely no.

One village. 350 inhabitants. All violent murderers – so why the hell do they arrange a murder mystery party on New Year’s Eve with a 1920’s twist?

350 murderers arrive at a house – all dressed as Al Capone, the only 1920’s criminal anyone remembers and the game hasn’t even begun when the first guest is shot or stabbed or strangled. With only a crap fireworks display or Jools Holland’s Hootenanny to look forward to its not long before the house reverberates with the sound of gunfire and people being murdered in the dark because they’ve consumed all the alcohol and no one can get the wifi to work.

True Crime: QUACKERS by Terence Duck

Reading like a book, Quackers tells the, I’m culturally obliged to say, ‘riveting’ story of Terry Duck, Britain’s biggest ever gangster in what I’m culturally obliged to describe as ‘page turning prose.’ For twenty years myths and legends have grown around Duck’s attempts to subjugate a whole town by spreading violence, intimidation and fear and not much else because myths and legends are more fun than the squalid and unpleasant reality of spending the rest of your life in prison for all the crimes you definitely did do.

Reading it just makes you feel shit really.